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Sooner or later it had to happen, right? Your best bud would get married leaving you cruising in the single lane on your own. You played that scenario in your mind a few times before.

The idea of being a best man is very appealing. There’s nothing you would rather do for your best bud on his wedding day than dazzle wedding guests with a superb wedding toast and share heartfelt sentiments, but public speaking and you, well those words were never meant to be in the same sentence.

Banish some of the jitters early by focusing on the wedding toast not on your performance jitters. You can talk yourself into panic or you can talk yourself into giving one of the best wedding speeches ever heard. You pick!

Here are a few words to the wise to make your wedding toast top-notch.

- The key to success is starting early and being totally prepared. Do your research by talking with others who have given wedding toasts and check out web sources and library books too. Don’t go with “off-the-cuff” remarks. They simply won’t cut it when the time comes, trust me!

- Face the fear and use it. It’s only energy after all! When making a wedding toast, it can be very valuable to have extra energy at hand that you can use to captivate your audience and make your wedding toast memorable. A speech without the energy of performance anxiety is lacklustre and totally lacking in passion.

- Allow for several drafts. We’re not talking beer here, but rewrites of your speech. Don’t expect to nail it right off the bat. Write the wedding speech, let it sit for a few days and look at it again with fresh eyes. Then make some changes. Repeat this process until you feel comfortable with the results.

- A touch of humor is great in a wedding toast but it only works if it is gentle humor. There is no room in a wedding speech for sarcasm, spicy tidbits, gross jokes, too-personal stories, in-jokes or bad language.

- Share how you met the groom, how long you have known each other and one or two of your exploits. Talk about when he introduced you to his bride, how beautiful and talented and perfect for him she is and how you believe their marriage is bound to be wonderful. Make your wedding toast remarks tasteful and sincere.

- Short and sweet. Don’t be tempted to go longer than five minutes max for your wedding toast.

- Practice makes perfect. Practice your wedding toast in front of a full-length mirror and time it, allowing moments for audience response.

- Testing, one, two. If at all possible, find a few minutes before the reception starts to stand at the mike where you will be giving your wedding speech. Get a feel for the room from this point of view. Practice delivering to the audience, using eye contact with a few friendly faces or if looking directly at people makes you nervous, aim slightly over their heads.

- Extend arm. No, you are not shaking hands; you are preparing to give the actual wedding toast. Use a full glass, raise your arm from the shoulder, and look directly at the bride and groom when you toast them. This is the last part of the wedding speech.

- Walk to the bride and groom. Embrace the groom and the bride and go back to your seat. You’re finished with the wedding toast. Wasn’t that a great experience?

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